Trauma and Temperament

 


Please note, this article is not intended to diagnose or treat; it is not to be a substitute for therapy. Please seek professional therapy services if you or your loved one needs assistance in healing from past trauma.

I’m not a fan of mysticism or New Age. I am, however interested in personality and temperament.  It seems as if these things are natural, inborn, God-given qualities we have.  They can be our strength or our downfall, depending on how we use them. 
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I recently took a two-day training course offered by a consortium of local agencies who provide supportive services and advocacy for youths and families within the foster and adoptive communities.

Dr. Kate Messina was the presenter.   She spoke on how parents can combine the knowledge of temperament with effective parenting skills to gain greater results in personal and family functioning.

The elements of Air, Fire, Water and Earth can give us a hint as to how a child faced with stress or trauma may respond and interact with the world.  Below is a summary of what I learned, plus some of my random thoughts on temperament and healing. 

Try to find your temperament and the temperaments of those you love.

Air (the butterfly)
Temperament- extroverted, friendly, buzzing, pestering, energized
Sometimes diagnosed with ADD or ADHD
Normal development coaching opportunity- stay through boredom
Trauma response- withdrawal to avoid, leave
At risk for- runaway, shut down, screen-time addiction
 
Fire (the lion)
Temperament- extroverted, dominant, intense, powerful, demands attention
Sometimes diagnosed with ODD or Conduct Disorder
Normal development coaching opportunity- tame intensity
Trauma response- aggression, refusal to comply
At risk for- harm to others, damage to property, legal consequences
 
Water (the turtle)
Temperament- introverted, easy going, problem solver, people pleaser, observer, awareness of self and others yet not connected to self and others
Sometimes diagnosed with Social anxiety, anxiety or depression
Normal development coaching opportunity- stay and care
Trauma response- shutting down, fear
At risk for - codependency, drug use, screen-time addiction
 
Earth (the deer)
Temperament- introverted, deep feeler, deep thinker, quiet, careful, cautious, worries about the future, artist, perfectionism, others may call you “shy.”
Sometimes diagnosed with depression or anxiety
Normal development coaching opportunity- stay through uneasy feelings
Trauma response- shutting down, self-harm (cutting), suicide
At risk for- avoidant behaviors, closing everyone off, screen-time addiction
 
Healing from Trauma Based on Element Type
We will benefit from going back and nurturing those parts that were neglected or injured.  Get in touch with the strong aspects of your temperament.  If you feel comfortable doing so, imagine the child version of you and tell him or her that you are going to take him or her on an empowering journey.  Along the way, tell that child how brilliant, strong, beautiful (or other positive attribute) he or she is.

After you have engaged in the healing of your own element/s natural way of being, try out the other elements’ activities for healing to gain greater balance.
If you have a spouse or children, identify their element, respect their inborn qualities, watch for their potential weaknesses. and engage in healing activities for their benefit.
 
For the Air- Butterfly
Acknowledge inner strengths: friendly, engaging, fun, creative, optimistic, charming, social, spontaneous, flexible, engaging, carefree, witty, entertaining

Engage in the activities of: sports, play at the park, teach an aerobics class, swim in the ocean, create colorful artwork, organize a charity event or party, travel, join a debate club or take a speech class

Goal- find an outlet for social engagement; gain approval for your capacity for high energy

Balance with other element activities

For the Fire - Lion
Acknowledge inner strengths: bold, persistent, strong, risk taking, visionary, natural leader, charismatic, confident, decisive, independent, hard worker, entertaining, dynamic

Engage in the activities of: very physical (or aggressive) sports, build, create, accomplish, engage in a new business adventure, organize a community revitalization project, learn a new language, compete in a challenge of your interest or liking, act as a ‘change agent’ in an issue that compels you

Goal- find socially acceptable ways of expressing aggression; receive validation and approval for your intensity

Balance with other element activities

For the Water -turtle
Acknowledge inner strengths: love of learning, steadfast, loyal, good listener, sensitive, traditional, consistent, trusting, down to earth, realistic, dependable, dry humor, conservative

​Engage in the activities of: study something new (language, religion, history, philosophy, psychology), create a scrapbook or start a collection, organize a room, house or office, meditate, go for a long walk, hike or bike ride, travel and explore new places and faces

​Goal- find an outlet for learning and organizing; receive validation for your efficiency

Balance with other element activities

For the Earth- deer
Acknowledge inner strengths of stability, artistic, friendly, loyal, empathetic, nurturing, hard-working, consistent, logical, trustworthy, adaptable, self-controlled, hopeful, supportive, diplomatic

Engage in the activities of: create your own personal space, create art, read, enjoy alone time, go for a nature walk, hike, go camping, visit the mountains, participate in a poetry event or art festival

Goal- find meaning in life and suffering, engage in the meta of your existence; receive validation for your depth and sensitivity

Balance with other element activities
 
Sources:
Dr. Kate Messina, Chico, CA,
December 15-16, 2017 her site is at http://www.sacramentotherapyservices.com/
https://www.gaia.com/article/the-four-elements-finding-your-element
http://tudorhousetea.com/four-elements-balance/
http://tacomawaldorf.org/news/four-elements-four-human-temperaments/

Photo credit: 
Earth_Wind_Fire_Water_by_voxo, retrieved from http://yoelbloomberg.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-four-elements-earth-wind-water-fire.html

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