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​Quit Trying to Punish Your Narcissist

6/27/2018

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Quit Trying to Punish Your Narcissist
I hear so much about revenge and "destroying the narcissist."  I get it- Partners get hurt by insensitive and selfish behavior. But, I’m wondering if this is why we’ve seen such a spike in narcissistic behavior lately? Are we part of the problem?

We – the non-narcissists- the 'victims' of 'narcissistic abuse'- are escalating the situation by triggering more narcissistic behavior from the narcissist.  When we do hurtful things (regardless of what was done to us), we are sending a message that relationships aren't safe and people can't be trusted- and thereby validate the Narcissist's attitude and behaviors!

It's a vicious cycle. 

Not only that, when we purposefully seek revenge, we are 'stooping to their level' as the saying goes. No- actually we are worse because we are doing it on purpose. They are doing it because of a brain issue or unresolved trauma- or both. So, who really has the problem here?

Shouldn't we, the more emotionally mature and aware should be doing something different? I mean, we want different, right? We want out of the toxic dance. 

Let's sit this one out.

Dance the happy dance, my friends- M

Subscribe to my therapy vlog at Can We Talk? or find me @TweetmentPlan.  And, of course, come visit me here again soon! :)
​

Photo credit: pixabay

narcissist, revenge, learning, disability, brain
#narcissist 
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    The Motley Ms.

    Hi! My name is Melinda. I'm a saved-by-grace-er, lifelong learner, INFJ, health & fitness trynabe, Mom, #vanlifer, mental health vlogger, and Director & Clinical Supervisor at a Child & Family Therapy Practice in Northern California.

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