HOw To Set Healthy boundaries
A Time to Refrain From Embracing
There are times in life - seasons, if you will- where we must step back from people we have embraced in the past. People who make decisions that hurt us or have the potential to hurt us.
Abuse. Drugs. Alcohol. Betrayal. Denial. Justification. Rationalization. Voluntary blindness to suffering caused.
Yes, even if those people happen to be children, parents, a spouse, family or friends- the very people we have been taught to embrace at all times, regardless of their behavior. 'Love the sinner; hate the sin' and all of that nonsense.
The truth is, embracing a person or concept or behavior that is harmful only serves to condone evil. And where evil is condoned, it grows.
And all of our sacrificial embracing won't chase it away.
To be sure, that person, concept, or behavior has already stopped embracing us. They are (or it is) holding on to something (or someone) else: an addiction, sin, habit and/or "side partner" that puts us second or third or tenth on the list of "important things in life" from their perspective.
To continue embracing would be like trying to catch the wind. And tripping. And falling.
To continue embracing also means we are robbing them of a chance to learn and grow. They may actually need the sting of consequence for their ultimate good.
Yes, even more than they need an embrace.
Hold, accept, and support wisely my friends. And above all else, guard your heart, -M
There is a season for everything under the sun... a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing. Ecc. 3
Photo credit: This is poor journalism, but I don't remember where I found this beautiful artwork. The artist may not want to embrace the fact that I used it without proper credit, so if you find the source / link, please let me know!
I can always tell when I'm going to do some personal growth because my spirit gets quiet and reflective; I go on long directionless drives, and listen to a lot of Rich Mullins (whom I consider to be somewhat of soul brother, by the way).
And cry. A lot.
Today I sat on a bench overlooking a lake, did some deep breathing, ate some homemade granola, people watched, and read book about healing.
It's a process, you know?
A process with ups and downs and twists and turns. And work. And bravery. And persistence.
Life has a way of providing us with many opportunities to grow. And many of those opportunities happen to be unwanted life circumstances- which is probably why all of my personal growth has been done with a lot of kicking and screaming.
Except for today. Today was calm and reflective and brought some Aha Moments that made me smile.
I am thankful for today.
Enjoy those refreshing moments of your healing journey, my friends.- M
This life has shown me how we're mended and how we're torn;
How it's okay to be lonely as long as you're free.
Sometimes my ground was stony; sometimes covered up with thorns,
But only You could make it what it had to be.
- Rich Mullins
photo credit: pixabay
The Motley Ms.
Hi! My name is Melinda. I'm a saved-by-grace-er, lifelong learner, INFJ, health & fitness trynabe, Mom, #vanlifer, mental health vlogger, and Director & Clinical Supervisor at a Child & Family Therapy Practice in Northern California.
The Motley Ms
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