I'm having one of those days. One of THOSE days. You, know the kind of day where you just want to give up and live a life of binge watching Judge Judy, eating Ho-Hos and smoking crack. Ok, not the smoking crack part, but still... a kind of day where you can't drop enough F-bombs (on the inside) and wonder why you even try?
Yeah, therapists have them too. Or, at least this one does.
It might have something to do with the fact that I've been sick for five weeks, (and because no one else cleans up after themselves!!!) my house is a mess, it's hotter than balls outside, AND I double paid for non-refundable day camp AND daycare.
UGH! Or, I mean F--!!!
Then the reasonable part of my brain kicks in and says Judge Judy gets annoying by the first commercial, Ho-Hos don't offer enough protein to curb hunger, and I don't look good in baggy orange overalls (I'm guessing). Besides, my more mature, adult self says, "You've survived worse."
Since this is a therapy blog (or, it became one along the way- if not for you, then for me), I will pull back the curtain to the inner workings of mind to reveal how I (usually) pull out of such a mood... sooner or later...
The Very Mature, Insightful, Self-Controlled Therapist's Self-Talk Dialog for Positive Mental Health: A Transcript
- "You know what? It is an F- day. F- days happen. It's okay to have a bad day, week, month or year. The fact is, life is messy. Things go awry. People get into bad moods. It's not the end of the world. Maybe it will make a good blog post." (A sense of humor helps to ease stress. I amuse myself. So, win!)
- "Seriously? Drrrraaaaammmmmmaaaaa! It's not actually that bad. There are people who are in worse-off situations who would be willing to trade places with you in a heartbeat." (Although I could argue with myself over this one because your broken leg doesn't make my broken toe stop hurting... but you get the whole 'put things in perspective' thing right?)
- "You got this, SuperWoman! You strong! (Independent Woman plays in the background)
- (Music fades) "Only seven more hours until bedtime! Yay!"
- "FML" (Sometimes my positive self-talk train jumps the tracks.)
- "Things will get better." (It still counts if I grumble that, right?)
- "Shut up and go to the doctor. Again." (This is actually a form of self care in disguise.)
- "Self care? Did someone say pedicure?!"
- "Just sit your whiny butt down and write it out. You will feel better after you do." (Positive coping skills kick in. And, in fact, there is some benefit to writing.)
Other Skills for Self-Regulation Brought to You By an Emotionally Astute, Always Serene Mental Health Practitioner
- Move your body. (I would go to the gym if I wasn't sick.)
- Write an angry letter- filled with F-bombs, of course- to your struggle (or a person if that's the case) then tear it up into tiny little pieces.
- Toss a stress ball from hand to hand, making sure to cross your body. The contralateral movement will signal a shift in the brain away from emotional stuff to coordination and balance stuff.
- Do Suduko. The analytical part of your brain will kick in, diverting energy away from Emotion Central. For added effect, try to do Suduko while tossing a ball or juggling.
- Paint, color, or engage in other forms of creative play.
- Pet your pet. Fido and Fluffy are proven stress relievers.
- Laugh. Put on your favorite YouTube comedian or movie.
- Plan. Write out your Bucket List or baby-step goals for the future.
- Soak in the sauna or tub. The warm water is relaxing and who can be mad while naked?
- Pump Up the Jamz. Turn up your favorite music and dance around or scream or yodel. Hey, you do you. I won't judge.
- Cry, meditate, call a trusted friend, play a game, go for a nature walk, take some supplies to the homeless ... do anything other than simply stewing in frustration. Because stewing in frustration is icky. And it's hot outside. And stew is for winter.
I wish you happiness to enjoy the good days and coping skills to mange the bad ones. Be blessed in all circumstances, my friends -M
The Motley Ms.
Hi! My name is Melinda. I'm a saved-by-grace-er, lifelong learner, INFJ, health & fitness trynabe, Mom, #vanlifer, mental health vlogger, and Director & Clinical Supervisor at a Child & Family Therapy Practice in Northern California.
The Motley Ms
The Therapist's Therapy Blog